Sonia contacted me because she was tired of her yo-yo dieting, sick of working out and gaining weight. She knew her relationship with food wasn’t working, but she couldn’t stop! She said “I’m really motivated this time. In the past I’ve lost weight but I’ve always done it myself and it’s never lasted, I always gain the weight back, I need something besides a quick fix, (my go to which hasn’t worked) but still I struggle believing a quick fix isn’t the answer”!
When I begin working with a client I ask them what their weight was a year ago, six months ago and what it’s now? It shows us the trend and helps for getting honest.
Sonia: I can’t weigh myself it’s too scarey. We talked about it only being a number it doesn’t really matter it’s only a starting point but her thinking wouldn’t allow her to believe it, we agreed forget weighing for now. Like what you’re reading get my 3 day detox and healthy living tips.
Surprisingly, later she left a message, “Okay, it’s 176, I did it”. Later I reminded her, it’s only a number and she said “and it’s going down”!
During our first sessions we talked about what she was doing with food, how she thinks about her body, her weight the power food has in her life, her family, her culture and she realized she hadn’t had a good relationship with food, probably ever. “It’s been a painful topic for a long time. And I’m sick of it, especially when so many other areas of my life are so good! “I’m excited to begin, in a knew way”. I suggested she not weigh herself again if she doesn’t want to for awhile. But suddenly her desire to see results started to take over and she wanted to start weighing herself daily. I strongly encouraged her wait at least until our next session, she’d only agree to limiting it to twice. I know the seduction of the scale from my past and others, how do we not get attached to the results and yet continue to stay to true to what we want?
A few days later she left a message “I lost 1 1/2 pounds!” I could feel her excitement, and mine for her, what she was doing was working, what a great feeling!
When it comes to weighing yourself is the number just a number? Do you feel “bad” after you “weigh in”? Does it have the ability to make or break how you feel about YOU?
For Sonia, and ( was true for me and many of the people I’ve worked with), initially looking at the number was a reminder of all the times it used to be different, how it wasn’t now, and it isn’t the number she wants it to be, and than she beats herself up for all her failed attempts to keep “ideal number”. But, it’s not the number but the story which has the power to keep her/you attached to shame and judgement.
I began writing this blog over a week ago, this topic has been in my mind, this past Sunday I was at a service and the leader said to the congregants “turn to a person next to you and let them know how much we weigh!” Seemed so bizarre since this topic had been rattling in me and I know the power the number can have. (It wasn’t lost on me that the person sitting next to me, was a slight 21 year old guy.)
What about you? Do you weigh yourself? Would love to hear you “weigh in” on this!
Would you like to change your relationship with food, dieting and your self judgement?
Schedule a complimentary session. I’d love to hear your story, what’s in the way of your living in the body and life you love?