Does your eating or weight concerns effect your relationships? One week ago a relationship expert contacted me regarding the work I am doing and I began thinking of the correlation between food & relationships, and the connection in my life.
When I was overly invested in my need to change my body, lose weight, control my food I was also struggling in relationships. I used to use food to mask the feelings I was experiencing. I wasn’t able to express myself easily, I kept most of my needs and desires to myself, with food anesthetizing me, it was easier to do. I sunk deeper into myself, offering less and less of my true self to relationships because I was too afraid to admit I had needs, desires or thoughts that may be in conflict with the person or persons I was interacting with. So very few if anyone new my true needs, diligently I buried them within myself so I wouldn’t have to handle uncomfortable situations. Food was what I used to keep my life running “smoothly” free of conflict and difficult encounters. But that wasn’t really true because I was in turmoil inside which I didn’t share with anyone else. My goal was to portray everything as being FINE! And that was what it was, a portrayal, masking the truth. The more I hid from others the deeper my internal withholding. My experience of food + relationships, was that my main relationship was with food. I nurtured it, I protected it, I confided in it, I took comfort in it, I depended on it, I felt safe in it, I felt cared for by it. So when I hear my clients say I don’t know why I can’t get this food thing, I know it is “just food” I get it, because I know it is so much more then that! To your freedom from Food and to claiming your whole self you and the world need you, NOW!